The Bra is the Thing

I will change the names of the guilty in this story so that they can feel innocent. A while ago (this was even before I had kids), I was at a party. I was ready to go home, and I had on a big, puffy winter coat. (We were in Wisconsin in winter.) A dear friend, who we will call Matilda, was joking with me about my Michelin-man style coat. Now, Matilda is a lovely woman: poised, graceful, generous, works for underprivileged women. Really, one of the lovelier people I have known in my life. Much to my shock, in her jesting about my jacket, Matilda hauled off and slapped me hard, right on the girls. I believe she was just as shocked when I said, "Those are my BREASTS!" In her shock and dismay at what she had done, she quite innocently responded, "Well, what are they doing down THERE?"

~t